heartbreak

Someone define heart break to me please...what is it?When are we allowed to say that our heart has been broken,,,,does it only count for those who are at the receiving end of a break up for example?Is it only them whose heart has actually been torn apart, who cried and went through the stages of denial, shock,sadness, anger, hurt, and pain, waking up every morning with that odd ache in their chest, not knowing what it was that was clamming down on them making it hard to breathe, making it hard to move and physically painful to speak or smile or even look....Are they the only people who hurt, when a relationship ends, are they allowed to take all the credit for being hurt?Are they allowed to direct all their anger and sadness on the other person,the person who took the initiative to end it in the first place?
Yes...?No....?Maybe....?But why, why cant anyone understand or see how painful it must be for a person to end a relationship with someone he or she cares about and loves, why doesnt anyone want to hear about it, not wanting to understand the reason, or feel compassion, or take some of the blame directed towards this human being that must be aching and hurting the same , if not even more...why doesnt anyone see that loss doesnt just happen one way around,,,its a wave that hits forward and backwards slapping and crashing both shores with equal measure,,, if thats true,,,,and logically it is,,,then why doesnt anyone want to accept that a person who breaks up with someone doesnt always have to be the bad guy, who took it all and left someones heart bleeding on the sidewalk?Why doesnt anyone recognize how hard it is to say such cruel words to someone you have shared history with, to someone you respect and love and care about, to someone you have spent all your energy, time, love, tears and memories on,,,why doesnt anyone understand that saying to someone you love "its over",is actually harder for the person saying it than the one receiving it, why hasnt anyone thought about how disgusted and nostalgic one feel with themselves when they see that look of shock ,,,of dissapointment,,,of betrayal,,,cross the face of someone they love and worship so much,,,,how that face closes up,,,and becomes a blank canvas outlined only by anger and sadness and hurt pride,,,sometimes even by hate,,,,all feelings of warmth,,,affection and love gone,,,,blown away,,,,Why doesnt anyone see that hurting someone you love is like putting a knife through your own flesh,,,,like lighting up a fire underneath you,,,,like throwing yourself of a bridge into a sea ,,,so deep and black and scary and unknown,,,that you shiver with fear,,,with shame,,,with guilt,,,,with hesitance....
Why hasnt anyone ever tried to see beyond those persons word,,,,beyond his or her firm face and undeterred expression,,,behind those cold words and that firm stand,,,,,behind those bleak eyes,,,,behind those thoughts that he or she holds on to believing "its better this way"or "its for the best that way"...why....why hasnt anyone tried to stop for a second to see that person uttering those words,,,,crumbling to the floor,,,shaking with anger and sadness and hurt and loss,,,,tears flowing down that face that moments ago was bleached from all expressions,,,why doesnt anyone stay long enough to realize that sometimes a person is forced to give up on something,,,someone, he or she really loves,,,whether,,,a best friend,,,, a soulmate... a love they might never see again,,,a second half they might never be able to replace,,,why doesnt anyone stay long enough to see that this person cant be left to feel hurt and loss and anger alone,,,,,this person has to deal with shadows of darkness,,,plaguing him and her for a long long time,,,,with unanswered questions such as how is she/he doing?Does he/she hate me now?Does she/ he think i was playing them?Is she/he going to ever forgive/forget me?All questions with no answers,,,,all fears without rays of light,,,,all feelings of shame and guilt and hurt and anger at oneself and others,,,,a sea of mixed feelings,,,of lonliness and confusion and unforgivable thoughts,,,,they hunt us ,,,break us,,,shatter our soules,,,,me and you,,,,and everyone who has once boken up with someone,,,or said "its over",,,,or has once looked into a mirror to see sad eyes staring back ,,,saying:YOU BROKE SOMEONES HEART!"